Blogging allows me the opportunity to relax and take a break from my normal routine. It is very stress relieving when I’m able to write about my journey. The beautiful thing about reflecting is you have time to evaluate yourself and relationships. When I get stuck in a thought, a feeling, or a relationship, and I am confused about getting unstuck, I start to evaluate myself. I take the time to observe myself without judgment or reproach can be a powerful tool for change. I pay attention to what I say, what I think, how I’m feeling, how I act, or how I’m reacting. It is important not to judge but observe.
Recently, I started to reflect on a few relationships that mean a lot to me. I can remember at one point I was really close to certain individuals, and I am not sure what caused the division. One relationship, in particular, I have been praying about for some time. After several years, I decided to express my feelings about a multitude of things I have been feeling over the years. I wanted to reach out to mend things. After discussing things in great detail, we were able to apologize and agree to work on our relationship going forward. Self-Evaluation is important because we need to evaluate ourselves and see what are you bringing to the relationship and if you can make some improvements.
I’ve made a decision that I am not going to continue to carry the weight of relationships that are not balanced. I am going to stop holding onto people that have me on hold. I’ve agreed to make an effort to mend the relationships that are worth mending. I’ve been reflecting on my life and focusing more on living for today and enjoying life while I can.
As adults, we are supposed to evolve and grow. I enjoy helping and caring for others and making sure I reach out by visiting, texting, calling, and hosting events to foster relationships, and some people only want to receive. Then you have people who have a thousand excuses why they are not providing anything in the relationship. Meanwhile, I’m thinking to myself, I have several jobs, personal life, and yet I still make time to cultivate relationships. Relationships are supposed to be balanced.
This point forward I am going to focus on the people who appreciate what I bring to the table. As I continue to grow, I am learning that it is perfectly fine to know when it’s time to stop or when my giving has become destructive. I care more about my relationship with my inner being than anything else. If I am not in alignment with myself, I have nothing to offer anyone.
Knowing we desire growth and improvement is one thing. Always driving ourselves is another. Maybe the answer isn’t that we need to do better, try harder, push more. Maybe the answer is recognizing how well things are going with our career and personal life.
Pushing ourselves can become habitual that we deny ourselves any feelings of satisfaction. No matters how well or how much we do better, do more keeps pushing us on. It doesn’t let us rest. We still feel it isn’t quite good enough.
I had been pushing myself that hard, and I needed a real break. I had to give myself permission to put that drive aside. I had to quiet that part of me that wants to do more, be more, and accomplish more. I am learning how well I do things professionally, and personally, even if no one else appreciates my efforts.
I am learning that our world abounds with quiet, free sources of revitalization. My favorite activity is spending the day at the beach. I love reading books and falling asleep on the beach. And, when I leave the beach, I feel like I’ve been touched by the sun and changed.
Cherish your favorite spaces, and open yourself to discovering new places. I am learning to be happy now. I am enjoying the process of creating my life, myself, and whatever I am currently working on with my career or personal life. I am going to continue working towards my goals, but I am not waiting for the finishing moments to enjoy the moments, but I’m learning to take pleasure in my job and life. I am finding joy in the journey.